Books - The Groom To Have Been

I just finished this book, and I was disappointed.
The novel attempts to discuss the feelings of a second generation immigrant, the ability to integrate, the first generation's nostalgia for ‘home’ and then mixed into the plot are the complex reactions of a Muslim Indian community to 9-11.

It asks what is love and how do we decide who to spend the rest of our lives with. It blends new traditions with an older generation's ideas.

It is Saher Alam’s first novel. Coming from the same place as the older generation characters she is sharing her own thoughts and culture with us as we follow the main character a story of love, friendship, family and tradition.

I enjoyed the different customs, the wedding plans and ceremonies. Traditions always interest me and the way the younger generation found ways to blend the old and new into their lifestyle.

But the main protaganist, Nasr never felt like a real person, he is a stiff and slightly annoying character, someone that got on my nerves as I wished he would develop a backbone. You never really get a sense of a genuine personality, or even warmth and substance – this character comes across as  predictable and stereotyped.

Even though he did search for 3 years to find someone he felt he could marry while he continued his westernized lifestyle in New York, I felt he was just procrastinating.
His decision to agree to an arranged marriage doesn’t strike me as him believing in the old-fashioned custom, but rather the need not to make any decisions for himself.
In a love marriage, the desire to commit to someone for life comes after falling in love. In an arranged marriage, the opposite is true: with the commitment of marriage comes love.

From the start the reader can see that his true soul mate is Jameela, right there under his nose and he waits until it is too late! How I wished he'd wake up and realize it and they would run off together!