Canada

Forget Rednecks...

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to
 say about Canadians:

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from

September through May,

You may live in Canada .


If someone in a Home Depot store

Offers you assistance and they don't work there,

You may live in Canada .

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time,

You may live in Canada .

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation

With someone who dialed a wrong number,

You may live in Canada .
If 'Vacation' means going anywhere

South of Detroit for the weekend,

You may live in Canada .

If you measure distance in hours,

You may live in Canada .

If you know several people

Who have hit a deer more than once,

You may live in Canada .

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'

In the same day and back again,

You may live in Canada .

If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow

During a raging blizzard without flinching,

You may live in Canada .

If you install security lights on your house and garage,

But leave both unlocked,

You may live in Canada .

If you carry jumper cables in your car

And your wife knows how to use them,

You may live in Canada .

If you design your kid's Halloween costume

To fit over a snowsuit,

You may live in Canada .

If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km --

You're going 95 and everybody is passing you,

You may live in Canada .

If driving is better in the winter

Because the potholes are filled with snow,

You may live in Canada .
If you know all 4 seasons:

Almost winter, winter, still winter,

and road construction,

You may live in Canada .



(this is my favourite, because how true)

If you have more miles

On your snow blower than your car,

You may live in Canada .


If you find -2 degrees 'a little chilly',

You may live in Canada .





If you actually understand these jokes,

and forward them to all

your friends,



you definitely are Canadian and proud to be.